Two: Together; Apart (Sonnet Pair) 2/2

I shall not end my life and hurt you worse,

Despite the ideation in my mind--

How cruel an act! If reason I can find,

I'll fix it in my head, beguile the curse.

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No healing comes from lying in a hearse,

I know. There is no need, so don't remind;

If we can rest a little while, resigned

To wait, perhaps till New Year's. Then, a purse

.

Of reparations and of healing filled--

Now lighter, once the guilt and blame's released--

I'll offer you--if this bridge we can build.

And if that's not to be: dear friend, goodbye!

Night falls each day; sun rises in the east:

A Sadder Day.

. . . None blames me more than I.

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= = = = = = = = = = =

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R. I. P.

I love you.

I'm so sorry. You deserve a better friend than me.

Be well, love.