Area 11
The preparations were brief and to the point. Broadview insisted that Newkirk take a pistol, which the wizard took with distaste before tucking it into an inner pocket of his jacket.
After a few minutes, Beckton appeared in the company of two military policemen. He shook them off like it was nothing and nodded to the wizard, then picked up a Thompson sub-machine gun and inspected the weapon until the guards left.
"You didn't have to do that, Newkirk. It wasn't the first time I've been under the spotlight. It won't be the last."
Newkirk pulled on a greatcoat and shrugged.
"You're welcome. Is Osterl-"
As if summoned, the door to the armoury opened again. Peering from behind the doorway was a timid-looking woman in a nurse's dress and apron. She smiled and stepped in daintily, offering her hand.
"You must be Newkirk! I'm Osterley."
Newkirk bowed and went to kiss her hand. There were a few jumbled-up objects in the voluminous front pocket of her apron; one of them might have been a large revolver.
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Comments (5 so far!)
HSAR
Project 56, which followed Operation Wigwam, were tests that investigated the efficacy of the safety features on nuclear bombs. Conducted in Area 11 of the Nevada Test Site, the tests resulted in long-term, near-permanent plutonium contamination of that area. It continues to be a radioactive hazard today and is used for the training of personnel in radioactive monitoring and sampling.
- #3884 Posted 6 years ago
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Robert Quick
Two thoughts in regards to edits. In the second sentence of the first paragraph you have take and took in the same sentence which read kind of awkwardly to me. Next, the last sentence feels more Tell than Show if you know what I mean. Even if it's Newkirk's thought or assessment it doesn't quite read as such. Or maybe it's just a little bland.
Even in a few short sentences, Osterly is an interesting character. Timid looking, dainty, but quick to smile, and extend her hand, wears a concealed gun while in a traditionally (for the time period) female role. For a brief second, I wasn't sure if the contradictions were going to work for me but somehow, taken all together, they actually totally work and make her a complex character. I'm actually a little envious.
- #3889 Posted 6 years ago
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HSAR
@RQ: I didn't necessarily agree at first, but wound up re-writing after reading again because I didn't like the flow. So perhaps we had the same opinion after all!
- #3891 Posted 6 years ago
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Robert Quick
Glad to help. My criticism is always meant to be constructive, to help make a story the best story it can be: the most clear, the most interesting, the least plot hole-y (maybe most consistent), and so on. Ask Elsha sometime what it's like to have me really examine something intended for publication lol.
- #3895 Posted 6 years ago
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0
Inspired by (sequel to):
A round-faced man who might have looked more at home in a butcher's or a grocer's shouldered his way…
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HSAR
The Auto-Ordnance Company Thompson submachine gun, designated the M1928 and later the M1, was a general-issue weapon of US troops during WW2. It was a good weapon, but expensive to produce. The more cost-effective M3 Grease Gun was intended to replace it, but delays in getting it into service meant that the Thompson continued to be built in large numbers to the very end of the war.
Though divination is not completely impossible without direct line-of-slight - Newkirk demonstrates this in X-Ray (41643) - it is considerably harder. Newkirk may have underestimated Osterley, or may simply not have been checking people outside the room, but ultimately the cause of his surprise left unstated.