Emotions and Anaesthetics

Emotions rage & flare inside my mind


I panic, scream, & quiver oftentimes,


But these explosive feelings feel confined


Behind a barricade that muffles, mutes, & binds.

I know I'm having feelings, but their sound


Is stifled, distant; my heart seems quite numb.

I should be frightened, angry; all around


My heart there's insulation from their hum

I've had my times of tumult, every nerve


Resounding with emotions, very often.


I've also had full numbness--quite a swerve


From vivid, sharpened feelings. In a coffin


I float upon an ocean of extremes


A mixture of my fear, joy, & frustration


But in hermetic safety, they're lost dreams;


I fail to feel them, e'en with concentration.


& on the whole, if I must go through a crisis,


Disaster, or delight, I'd much prefer


To feel it as it happens; these devices


Inform me, at the least, that they occur.

So please, assist me as I tear these walls


Surrounding me into a pile of rubble,


For safety is desired, but my heart calls


For some intensity, beyond the bubble.