Worst Super Hero Costume

Author: THX0477

The Doctor has returned.

"Hey," came a less than confident voice, "How about you stop, or else...you know...the fighting, and stuff."

Three surly thugs looked from their would be victim, a timid businessman, to see a lone figure clad in impossible armor standing under the streetlight. The armor gleamed, an array of segments and pieces that seemed to slide effortlessly over one another. An expressionless face plate met their curious gazes.

One assailant giggled. It wasn't that the would-be hero was too small to be imposing. Perhaps, the slumped shoulders and half bowed head suggested a certain lack of confidence. It wasn't that his voice failed to boom and resonate through the dark alley. The hint of a sigh as the shoulder settled lower didn't exactly scream heroic vigor.

Mostly the giggle was on account of the armor being entirely pink, three or four shades, but all of them decidedly pink.

After an awkwardly long pause, all three hoodlums broke down laughing hysterically.

Roughly two minutes later they stopped laughing.

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Comments (5 so far!)

Average reader rating 4.50/5

ethelthefrog

I like the commentary here. Pink implies woman. Woman implies weakness. Weakness implies that they can carry on with impunity.

The fact that the hero might not be a woman doesn't occur to them.

The fact that a woman might be able to hand them their arses on a plate also doesn't o occur to them.

I love how you wrap it up in a single sentence at the end, too.

#623 Posted 10 years ago
0
4 out of 5

ElshaHawk LoA

My son says Real men wear pink, so it must be okay. Either the hero needs to kick some butt, or the villains need to pee their pants laughing in the next scene. The businessman takes a picture and runs off.

#626 Posted 10 years ago
0

HSAR

Great stuff, THX. Always love a bit of unconventionality.

I agree with Elsha's son, men who wear pink are real men. Sadly I'm not quite that confident in my wardrobe...

#627 Posted 10 years ago
0

aslargeasalone

@THX0477, may I write a sequel to this? I have some notions. I want to find out what happens in those two minutes...

#959 Posted 9 years ago
0
5 out of 5

Storykeeper

Hmm. I really want your hero to be a character that uses others' assumptions against them, but the title and opening line suggests a sort of self-loathing in the character that I don't want to be there. Or DOES it? Is it all part of the act?

#1769 Posted 8 years ago
0